| Apr262007 | Size Up |
Ladies; I saw.
After years and years of observing the human race scurry about like cockroaches on a kitchen floor, I finally witnessed a woman sizing up another woman. Maybe I’m slow but I like to think women are extremely subtle about these sorts of things. They simply must look at another woman’s outfit but THEY MUST NOT BE DISCOVERED.
It all played out in front of me in slow motion: two women walking towards each other. I see the pair of eyes flick downwards toward the shoes and I watched her pupils dance as they quickly passed judgment. Then the eyes crawled upwards; evaluating the dress with the black on white floral print, the belt, the top and the hair.
The reminds me of the time I went out and one of the girls would not stop pointing out how certain girls in the club were wearing such slutty clothes. I had to put a quick stop to the bitchiness and draw out the human in her.
I sat her down very purposely and I told her that maybe these girls have been working hard and it’s their first time out in a long time and they want to let their hair down and dress a little slutty. Maybe they’ve been stuck in the same boring work clothes for weeks and they need to feel a little slutty. You don’t know what they’re going through so you should just let them have their fun for tonight. Tomorrow they might wake up with panda eyes and a hangover and remember they have to go into the office on a weekend to hand in those TPS reports.
So all you sluts out there?
You should thank me for defending your honor. Your slutty, slutty honor.
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