| Aug182007 | New York |

This photo makes me all sorts of sad. New York by michael_hughes
There’s a long weekend coming up and I have no plans. I thought to myself, “Would it be crazy to fly to New York by myself? Fly to one of the world’s biggest cities and just do nothing for three days?” I don’t take this thought seriously but it opens up some interesting doors in my brain.
What strikes me is that there’s no one I’d particularly care to go with. Going through the tiny checklist of people that I know, there really isn’t anyone I’d want to spend 3 whole days with. I have all sorts of excuses: I don’t know them well enough, I don’t get along with them well enough, they have a horrible sense of humor, etc.
After whining to myself for a while, I realize I’ve been feeling like a victim of circumstances but I’m just as much of victim of my own brand of heavily-internalized crazy.
But back to New York. I was talking to a friend yesterday about how I naively thought that moving to America would instantly mean some sort of amazing Manhattan lifestyle. I knew deep down that I was being an idiot but I turned a blind eye because I needed to stay in a state of happy ignorance so as not to freak out about moving by myself to fucking America. New York looks great on TV.
This friend turns to me and says, “So are you going to move to New York?”
Ha! Like it’s even an option. I thought it was crazy that they were taking me seriously but I guess that is what is happening to many college grads all across this country. You just move out to some other state and try to build a life and if it doesn’t work then you try something else and exhaust all possible options until you are forced to come crawling back to your parents.
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